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"We are the protagonists of our stories called life, and there is no limit to how high we can fly."


Type rated on A330, B747-400, B747, B757, B767, B737, B727. International Airline Pilot / Author / Speaker. Dedicated to giving the gift of wings to anyone following their dreams. Supporting Aviation Safety through training, writing, and inspiration.

Tuesday, December 3, 2013

Airplanes and Women

A friend sent me this photo and sixteen reasons why airplanes are easier to live with than Women. I had to add a comment for each. What do you think?


Enjoy. Laugh. Please share your comebacks.


1) Airplanes usually kill you quickly - a woman takes her time.
  • Women, do we see a problem with this?

2) Airplanes can be turned on by a flick of a switch.
  •  There are no easy buttons in life.

3) Airplanes don't get mad if you do a "touch and go."
  •  Yeah, but a plane can do multiple touch and goes in an hour.

4) Airplanes don't object to a preflight inspection. 
  • Oh... sounds like foreplay. Maybe you're doing it wrong. 

5) Airplanes come with manuals to explain their operation. 
  • Read Cosmo.

6) Airplanes have strict weight and balance limitations. 
  •  No kidding. So maybe we should not overload our women!

7) Airplanes can be flown any time of the month. 
  • Yeah, right. Try flying through a hurricane season. 

8) Airplanes don't come with in-laws. 
  • Sometimes they do. Called passengers. 

9) Airplanes don't care about how many other airplanes you've preflighted and flown before. 
  •  Smart airplane owners don't brag about the other equipment they've owned and operated.

10) Airplanes and pilots both arrive at the same time. 
  • Nope. I met a guy who landed ten miles behind his plane. 

11) Airplanes don't mind if you look at and board other airplanes. 
  •  Women don't either. It's just going to be a one way flight.

12) Airplanes don't mind if you buy airplane magazines. 
  •  Smart women understand picture books are easier than reading for most men.

13) Airplanes don't comment on your piloting skills.
  • Oh yes they do. "Retard! Retard! Retard!"

14) Airplanes don't whine unless something is really wrong. 
  •  And then it's too late...

15) However, when airplanes go quiet, just like women, it's usually NOT good.
  •  So true!!!

28 comments:

  1. When operating in busy airspace, a good pilot knows to transmit as little as possible.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. D.B. - I would add "and be VERY, VERY alert!"

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    2. I would make sure you both duck when your wives read. lol

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  2. Someone's radial engine has a non-firing piston. I only see 15, not 16.

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    Replies
    1. And I bet you notice when a woman gets her hair cut too. :)

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    2. I do. I don't always say anything, but I notice. Sometimes no comment on a new haircut is the safest policy. :D

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    3. No, a COMPLIMENT on the haircut is ALWAYS the best policy!

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  3. Clearly, a woman pilot/engineer is the best option in life.

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  4. Reminds me of the 10 reasons why women prefer airplanes shirt: http://powderpuffpilot.com/products/clothing/t-shirt.aspx

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    Replies
    1. Oh... the print is too small. Can you find it and post? Would love it!

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  5. Which one is difficult? Manage the women or the aircrafts? When explain this question that we can fix it easily :)

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    Replies
    1. Never yell. Never push the wrong buttons. Don't try to over control her! And tell her she is beautiful. So... which is this for, woman or plane? Oh... both! Thanks for your comment.

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  6. I would argue that #1 is incorrect. The word "usually" seems to indicate this is more common than it is. I personally know hundreds and hundreds of pilots and they have never been killed by an airplane. :-)

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    Replies
    1. Exactly! lol. Maybe we should say, planes won't go to jail if they do. :)

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  7. Brilliant answers all, Miss Karlene!

    As a male and a pilot, I shall take the 5th and remain quiet on this subject...

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  8. I am not a pilot but I pretty much agree with all those points but I will never read cosmo. I do think aircraft are easier to understand :-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lol... Actually, it's been a long time, but there are some pretty funny things in there. And there are pictures. :) Yes, airplanes are much more straight forward. Thanks for your comment!

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  9. I am not a pilot but I do think aircraft are easier to understand than women but then thinking of some of the recent air crashes which are blantant pilot error I do wonder.

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  10. I'm with Eric! Been married long enough to know when to "let it be". :)

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    Replies
    1. Lol... I called Eric a chicken, but maybe smart is a better word. :)

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  11. Women are like flying airplanes: always have a plan for the unexpected, and you need to know the subtle reactions they do.

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    Replies
    1. Lol... so true! And don't forget to tell them they are beautiful. :)

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  12. Aircraft are usually 'replaced' after 25 yrs or so.Women are.... er... I'd better be careful here!
    Very funny piece.

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    Replies
    1. Lol... oh that's funny! But sometimes that can work to their favor.

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  13. LOL :D
    Loved it. Especially point number 15! Quiet is not good! :p

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    Replies
    1. Thanks Jim! Yes... quiet is not always the best thing.

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